A Year Already

Jay graduated from the Academy one year ago today and is now officially off of "probation." I can't believe how fast the time has gone. What a blessing it is for him to have a career he loves so much.

Congratulations, Officer Fear! You pretty much rock.

Bad Surprise, Good Surprise

I have been a negligent blogger this week, but I swear I have a good reason.

I threw out my back on Wednesday while trying to pick up my moose of a son. It was so bad that I was incapacitated on the floor for 15 minutes while Dexter screamed out of hunger and Bea cried out of worry. I was finally able to get a hold of my mom (who luckily was coming to visit me that day anyway), and she came over and took care of me and the kids until bedtime. Hurting your back really stinks, you know that? It has not been a fun few days. Luckily, through a miracle of circumstances, Jay was able to get Thursday off in addition to his regularly scheduled days off of Friday and Saturday, so he was able to take care of me and the kids on those days. I was feeling better yesterday, but being out and about at church today has not helped, and now my back is hurting again. Alas, Jay is at work and I am just going to have to deal. At least I can walk now... that first day was so horrible I thought I was going to have to have back surgery.

Anyway, the reason I bring this up is this: While I was in my invalid state on Wednesday, my friend Stacy kindly brought Natalie home from school for me. When I opened the door for her, I saw a UPS package on my porch. Stacy handed it to me and as soon as the door was closed, I tore it open. I was excited to see what it was because #1, I hadn't ordered anything recently, and #2, there was no return address, except the name of a company. When I got the package open and saw what it was, I started to cry.

It's our blog, made into a book. MY WORDS, published in a book. Our Academy experience, complete with pictures, for us to hold and read and pass down to our children. I was so touched that I couldn't stop crying. It was such a wonderful surprise and it brought a smile to my face on the cruddiest of days. There was no note, no return address, so I had no idea who had sent it to us. I called a couple of people but did not discover the source of the gift until later in the day when I had an "ah ha!" moment and realized who it was. I won't tell you all who it was, since they probably wouldn't want me to, but I hope they know how sincerely both Jay and I appreciate the thought, effort, and love that went into the book. It blew us both away, and we know it will become a family heirloom that we will treasure always. Thank you so very much.

So that is what has been going on these past few days. I have more to post but it will have to wait for another time. Right now, I need to go rest! Happy Mother's Day to all you wonderful mothers out there. I hope you have a relaxing and treat-filled day!

Officer Fear in the house!

Friday April 18th now holds a holy place in Fear Family History. Besides our marriage and the births of our children, Jay's graduation from the California Highway Patrol (OOO-RAH!) Academy was the best day in our lives. It was a long time coming but I can tell you this: it was worth every single second apart.

The day started early because Jay (who had overnight liberty) woke up at 4:30 a.m. to leave our hotel room and head back to the Academy. I was able to fall asleep for about another hour, but I was too excited to sleep any longer than that. At 7:30 a.m. my Dad knocked on my door (he was staying in the same hotel) and we headed downstairs for our oh-so-posh continental breakfast. Nothing like an apple and a hard-boiled egg to settle your nervous stomach!

At 8:45, Dad and I met up with other family members at the famous IKEA parking lot, where I doled out tickets and instructions. We raced over to the Academy just in time to see part of the formal inspection. I searched through the sea of tan and green and spotted Jay. Just like during the Capitol Run, my stomach did a little nervous dance when I saw him. The uniform looked great and he looked so happy. He spotted me, too, and smiled. He also saw the girls and all the other family members that came to support him. Even from where I stood, I could tell that the sight of all his family there to support him made him a little emotional.

Inspection (Can you spot Jay?)

While inspection was wrapping up, my mom and I brought the girls over to the babysitting area. As we were signing them in, the soon-to-be-officers marched by and we were lucky enough to get a close-up view of Jay.

After the girls were all settled in the babysitting area, my Dad, Betsy, Jay's brother Jack and I made our way into the gym where the graduation ceremony took place. The rest of the family either headed to the "TV room" where the ceremony was being shown on television, or they waited outside due to the lack of tickets. My sister-in-law Cher was kind enough to take care of Dexter for me during the entire ceremony, which made it much easier for me to pay attention! Thanks, Cher!

The ceremony began with the playing of a song called "The Badge of Trust." This is a song that is played on the CHP website, and I have to admit, I usually think it's kind of cheesy. Jay and I have chuckled at it on more than one occassion. But let me tell you, when I saw Jay's class lined up to come into the gym, all in their uniforms, with that song playing in the background, well... I started to lose it. I tried to hold it together since the ceremony had just begun and I had to keep my make-up in tack for at least one more hour, but it wasn't easy.

The rest of the ceremony included various speakers and awards presentations, then culminated with each cadet walking across the stage to receive their badge and shake the Commissioner's hand. We weren't supposed to cheer until after all the cadets crossed the stage, so instead I started sobbing as soon as Jay's name was called. All the hard work, the months apart, the stress, the uncertainity of Academy life, all of it came back to me as he walked across the stage. I was so proud of him. He did it!!

When all the cadets received their badges, they were officially sworn in as California Highway Patrol officers. I was crying during the swearing in, too. It just made everything feel so REAL. Jay is an officer... he has taken an oath to protect and serve the people of California and to lay down his life if necessary. It is such a heavy responsibility, but I know that Jay is up to the task. He has received top-notch training and has gained strength and confidence to boot. I know he is going to be a great officer.

After the swearing in, the new officers marched out of the gym and headed out to the quad for the badge pinning. I personally had been looking forward to this part for months! Jay stood in his assigned place and, when instructed, held out his badge in his left hand. One of the sergeants then yelled out, "Badge pinners, approach your officer." I walked up to Jay and took the badge. "Badge pinners, please pin the badges!" I then pinned Jay's shiny new badge on his uniform, with all of our family standing by and cheering. Cue my tears (again)! I felt so honored to be the one to pin on Jay's badge. 27 weeks led up to that moment, and it was one that Jay and I will never forget.

After the badge pinning, the officers did one last "fountain ceremony." The fountain ceremony is a ceremony that honors the approximately 215 fallen CHP officers. When that was completed, the officers were free! Done! Finished! Jay's days at the Academy were over.

We all went to lunch at - where else - Ikea, then headed back to the Academy for the EVOC (driving) demonstration. It was pretty exciting to see the patrol cars whipping around the track, doing 360's, filling the air with their white tire smoke. I was slightly paranoid that one of the cars would lose control and crash into us all, but of course everything was fine.

After EVOC, Jay took us all on a tour of the Academy grounds. This is when the kids started to lose it. It had been a long day with no nap for Dexter and no rest for the girls. It was getting rough. So, Betsy took the girls home while I helped Jay clear out his room. Man, those rooms are small! Jay was so luckily to be roommate-free for the last several months. Anyway, he packed up, we walked around and talked for a few minutes, and then Jay went to the Staff office and turned in his keys. That's it. No more Academy! Hooray!

We are now enjoying Jay's week off until he reports for work on the 28th. This next phase is called "break-in," and by all accounts is as tough, if not tougher, than the Academy. He will be working long hours and there will be a lot of stress, but we will get through it. I am just so happy to know that I'll get to see him once a day. What a concept!

Thank you to all of you for your continued support throughout this journey. Your thoughts and prayers have meant more to us than you know. So thank you. That being said, don't think you can go speeding down 101 and get away with it now, k?

Capitol Run April 16th

Wednesday morning I woke up before the crack of dawn, threw on some jeans and my CTC-III-07 t-shirt, and headed out of my hotel room to meet some of the other cadet wives. We were headed to the Academy (well, outside of the Academy) to watch Jay's class start the Capitol Run. The Capitol Run is a tradition that each cadet class takes part in where they run about 5 1/2 miles from the Academy to the State Capitol building. I was so excited to be there that I didn't even care that my hands were numb and that my camera wasn't cooperating.

Waiting with the wives

As we waited for the senior class to come running out of the Academy, the wives and I chatted and tried to keep warm by holding cups of hot chocolate. It was awesome to see the junior class lined up along the sides of the road, waiting to honor their seniors. When the junior class turned on their flashlights, got in plank position, and yelled out "ooo-rah!" I squealed like a little girl.

The juniors lined up and waiting

At about 5:30 a.m., I saw the senior class coming. Actually I should say I heard the senior class coming. They were yelling out cadences as they ran, and the sound sent shivers up my spine. As they came running by we screamed and cheered for them, and I scanned the group for Jay. I wish I could explain the feeling I had when I saw him... I thought my heart was about to explode out of my chest. I was excited and proud and even started to get a little emotional. Jay spotted me, too, and smiled as he ran past. He even managed to sneak me a wave, which brought a few chuckles from the crowd.

After they ran out of the Academy grounds, the wives and I hopped in our cars and drove over to the State Capitol building where we waited for them to arrive. It was so exciting to see and hear them come running down the street, flanked by patrol cars and motorcycles. There were even some bystanders who dropped down and started to do push ups in honor of the cadets. We cheered and screamed and generally made fools of ourselves as they ran by.

When the cadets stopped, they had a brief ceremony with the Captain at the Fallen Peace Officers Memorial on the Capitol grounds. It was especially touching because the cadets were running in honor of Officer Tony Pedeferri of Ventura. (Click here for Tony's story.) After the speech by the Captain, the cadets ran to the other side of the Capitol building and we ran like maniacs after them. (Man, my shins were killing me the next day. I really need to get some regular exercise!) The cadets had their class picture taken and then put on a display of knuckle push ups. When they were done, they walked single file down the steps to shake hands with the Captain and some other higher-ups. I tried to get a good picture of Jay because he was right in front of me, but my camera was not cooperating. I got a good picture of his shoe, though. I was consoled by the fact that as he walked by, he sneakily patted my hip and smiled. It made my morning.

Jay is in the back row (middle)

Besides graduation (which I'll blog about shortly, I promise), the Capitol Run was the highlight of the week. I was so proud of Jay. It really wasn't that long ago that Jay was at his heaviest weight of all time. To think he would ever be running 5 1/2 miles seemed kind of silly... and now... well, now I know he can do anything. I always had faith in him, but to see it all come to fruition is a feeling that I just can't describe. (And if you think the Capitol Run made me emotional, just wait until I tell you about graduation!)

Week 26, ya'll!

I think that face says it all, right?

Week 26 is done and we are now in the final week of the Academy. Aw, yeah! I can't even put into words how great it feels to be less than a week from graduation.

I've been so preoccupied with graduation prep and Spring Break that I hardly remember what happened at the Academy last week. Hmmm, let's see... he had some boring HazMat classes, learned a lot about terrorist attacks, and ... yeah, that pretty much sums it up. In week 25 they received their badge numbers, and last week they received their police ID's. It's so official! All he needs is to get through this week and get that badge, baby!

So tomorrow I leave for my graduation-week-mini-vacation. That's right - just me! Nana and Grandma are sharing the kid-watching duties until Friday, and I am so grateful. The CHP has some things planned for the week, and some of the other cadet wives and I have some plans of our own. Wednesday night is the debut of The Dress at the cadet party, and Friday is The Big Day! I am so excited, I can hardly draft a coherent post. I'm writing under the influence of giddiness, you know, so don't judge me.

I will have a probably-too-lengthy graduation report for you all next week. Until then - ciao!

25 down, 2 to go!

This is going to be a short recap, folks. (Is that a "hallelujah" I hear?)

Week 25 was focused on one thing: emergency medical response. The cadets spent all day every day learning CPR and many other lifesaving techniques. The CHP is almost always the first on the scene of an accident, so the knowledge the cadets gained this week is essential. You never know if you might be able to do something to save someone's life in the time it takes for the paramedics to arrive.

One thing he learned to do was deliver a baby! You'd be surprised how often officers have to do that. In fact, one of Jay's instructors has done it twice! And a few months ago Jay told me about an officer (someone he went on a ride along with, actually) who was driving his pregnant wife to the hospital but there just wasn't enough time. He pulled over and had to deliver his own child. Amazing! So, obviously, now that Jay's a certified EMR (Emergency Medical Responder), I'm totally having him deliver any future children we may have...................what? Does that not sound like something I would do?

So week 25 is done and we have 2 weeks to go. Only one more sad Sunday goodbye, I can't believe it. I'm a little preoccupied with graduation week preparation, but it's a good preoccupied. I just wish we were given more tickets to the ceremony... I'm so proud of Jay, I want to invite the world!

Lookin' good!

In case you can't tell what this is, it's the "Countdown to Daddy's Graduation" calendar that hangs on our fridge. We've been crossing off a square every day for almost six months. I can't tell you how happy I'll be to get that thing off my fridge. :)

Ride Along Weekend

Week 24 was a blissfully short week. It was “ride along weekend,” where the cadets get to go on a ride along in their assigned office. Many cadets have to travel on Friday, do their ride along on Saturday, and look for a place to live in their new area during their remaining weekend hours. Since we didn’t have to spend time traveling or house hunting, Jay was able to come home Thursday night and we were able to enjoy a few extra hours together on Friday.

Jay’s ride along was scheduled for the swing shift (1:30 – 9:30 p.m.) on Friday. Before he went to the office, he took the opportunity to take Natalie to school. She was very excited, and later told me her favorite part of the day was bringing Daddy to school and showing him her class’s newly hatched baby chicks.

When Jay went to the ride along, I made a conscience effort to not expect any phone calls and to not expect him to walk through the door until midnight. See, I’ve been undergoing an Academy training of my own. Pre-Academy, I would call Jay or he would call me at least 5 times every day about all sorts of extremely important issues, like which of the Lord of the Rings movies is best or whether or not we thought the girls would try salmon for dinner. Pre-Academy, I stressed out when Jay had to deliver pizzas at night because I didn’t like putting the kids to bed without his help. And cooking? Forget it... that was his domain for 2-plus years and I wasn’t shedding a tear over it.

Now, post-Academy (well, almost), I feel much more confident in my abilities. I don’t need to consult Jay on every little detail. I don’t have to talk to him once an hour, although I would be happy to if I could. I can whip up dinner without a problem, even if it’s still not my favorite thing to do. And putting the kids to bed? I’m a pro. For the first time in a long time I feel like the house really belongs to me – I am the CFO, baby. (That’s Chief Family Officer, obviously.) I feel that I can handle Jay’s long work hours because the Academy has prepared me as best as it could. Jay is not the only one who has gone through a transformation... I just wish mine included some of the weight loss that his did!

So back on the topic of Jay’s ride along... that was the topic I was originally on, in case anyone has forgotten. Jay was assigned to a officer who also happens to be one of the San Jose office’s FTO’s (Field Training Officers). They had a beat that was practically in our backyard – highway 85 between Cottle and Hwy 17. The beat also included some unincorporated city streets near our neighborhood. I had no idea he was that close to home until he came home that night.

Although Jay didn’t experience any DUI arrests, major crashes, or car chases during his ride along, he had a blast. He observed and helped out with several speeding tickets, a minor crash, disabled vehicles, and a handful of seatbelt tickets. (Buckle up, people!!) Oh! And there was a carpool violation... man, that is not a ticket you want to get. I think the fee is up to just under $400. Yikes! But I think his favorite part of the day was interacting with regular ‘ol citizens of San Jose, like the kids that stared at them in awe as they walked into the restaurant, or the man who needed directions to the Eqyptian museum. He really does love helping people. Many years ago, Jay told his mom that he didn’t need to do well in high school because he was busy perfecting his “social skills.” Who knew he would really be able to get paid for those social skills!

It was great for Jay to get a taste of what a typical day on the road will be like. He absolutely loved it and is now even more anxious for graduation, if that’s possible. Senioritis will probably be even more intense now that he’s had a taste of what it’s like to be an officer. Luckily for him - luckily for all of us - there are just 3 weeks left!

Week 23 - Senioritis setting in

It's odd how right when time should be moving at break neck speed, it seems to be slowing to a screeching halt. Senioritis is definitely setting in for both me and Jay. I am so excited that we have completed 23 of 27 weeks, but I do feel a bit like a 5 year old waiting for Christmas day. It's painful.

Nothing really news-worthy happened at the Academy this past week. The cadets have a little more free time than usual, but basically they can only use it to study. Yawn. Jay did use some free time at lunch the other day to play around on the Skid Pan, which was fun. But he doesn't get to do that everyday.

One of the benefits of being close to graduation is that the PT Staff is now letting the Seniors run their own PT sessions. The staff is there, of course, but they aren't leading the workout. The Seniors can go at their own pace (as long as they're not slacking) and they can even listen to music! Nice! It's turning into a country club out there! ;) Also, now that the Seniors have their assignments, they can decorate their PT shirts to show where they will be going. People usually put the freeway symbols and maybe pictures of things that the area is known for. Here is Jay's:


I love that he's essentially calling himself a yahoo.

The first day that they wore their decorated shirts, one of the PT staff started giving Jay a hard time about the Ebay and Yahoo logos:

Officer: FEAR! What's all this computer crap on your shirt?
Jay: Sir, these companies are based in San Jose and that's where I'm going.
Pause.
Officer: That's pretty dang creative.

Of course yesterday another officer gave him a hard time about it as well, asking if he was sponsored. It was good natured, though. The staff has been much cooler to Jay's class now that graduation is looming. The Seniors need to be careful that they don't get too relaxed, however, because the Staff is bound to turn on them if they do.

In other news, things have been moving along well on the home front. All three kids are healthy and usually happy. Last week Natalie was Student of the Week! This wasn't the special kindergarten student of the week award, it was the school-wide student of the week award. We are very proud of her, and I am especially happy that the award didn't come with one of those bumper stickers. I just don't think I could do it.

On Saturday we had a fabulous day at Gilroy Gardens (formally known as Bonfante Gardens). The girls call it Farnfarnte Gardens, no matter how much we try to correct them. My mother-in-law Betsy was the reason we were able to go, so THANKS Mom! She came with us and we all had a wonderful time. The sun was shining, the kids were well behaved, and Jay and I shared a funnel cake. All the stars were aligned.

My little tourists

Dexter's first ride - the Goldfish!

Natalie and Bea on the Tubs-of-Fun, otherwise known as The Spinny Things

Just chillin'

Bea and Grandma on the Artichoke Dip

Right before Dex started imitating me saying "Weeeeeee!"

Waving to his fans

Sunday drive circa 1920

"Mommy, when can I drive a real car?"

"When you're 16."

"That's going to take a long time."

Week 22: Another good week

Week 22 was a week of accomplishments. It started on Monday during PT. As you may or may not recall, the cadets have to earn their official CHP PT shirt. Until they do they wear plain white t-shirts with their names on the back in puffy, marshmallow-like writing. It indicates how "soft" they are, I suppose. After PT on Monday the Staff held up three of the official shirts and started calling out the names of the cadets who earned them. The third cadet called was Jay. Whoo hoo! It was a long time coming, but Jay's been putting in a ton of effort in PT and his performance in ASP training and in a 10K run in Week 21 sealed the deal. He was pretty sure he was going to be a marshmallow all the way until the end of the Academy, so getting his shirt back was a nice bonus.

On Tuesday we found out our assignment! I already posted about it ,but just in case you missed it, we get to stay here in San Jose! Deep down I had a feeling that we would at least be staying within commuting distance, but one thing I'm learning is that there are no guarantees in this career. I was prepared to pack up and move to El Cajon if I had to, but boy am I glad to be staying here in our cozy 1950's ranch-style house with renter's carpet, bad plumbing, and a shower that looks like it came straight out of the Emerald City. And I'm actually not being sarcastic!

On Wednesday Jay had his much anticipated final driving test. The test is called Code 3 and includes driving like a maniac and chasing another car through city-like streets. You can imagine what fun he had. And the good news is, he passed on the first attempt! It is a relief to have EVOC, one of the biggest obstacles to graduation, behind him.

On Thursday the cadets had graduation practice with the new commissioner in attendance. Jay also started his DUI report. This is a report that will actually be sent to his Field Training Officer (FTO) upon graduation, so it needs to be in tip top shape. First impressions, and all that.

Friday Jay got to come home. That might not seem like something to write about, but it was his first Friday home in two weeks so we were all very excited. He was even home in time to read stories to the girls and tuck them in to bed. It's little things like that we've all been missing since he's been away. I'm so thankful we are on the downhill slope.

The weekend was busy with errands but we also found some time to just hang out and, in the words of Michael Scott, shalax. But the biggest weekend news of all? I found my dress for the graduation party! I am returning the other two I bought last weekend... I'm such a bulimic shopper. I don't really have a choice though, since the new one was just a tad more expensive than I planned. I am justifying it with the fact that I already have awesome shoes to go with it and since it's a little black dress, I will be able to wear it a lot. (Right?) Now I just need to go through my closet and decide what I'm going to wear to the actual graduation ceremony. Decisions, decisions. It's going to be captured on film for all time, so it's critical that I don't look ... lame. Wish me luck.

Natalie and Daddy getting ready for a Saturday morning run

A rare occurance: Unhappy Dexter

Bea, so proud of her kerchief!

Drum roll, please...

At 6:30 this evening I got a call from my friend and fellow cadet wife, Katie, who frantically asked me, "So, where are you guys going?!?" It took me a minute to know what she was talking about. Then it clicked. She wanted to know where we had been assigned. I told her we didn't know yet and she said, "Well, some of the wives are posting their assignments online." (We have a CHP Wives group on MySpace.) I freaked out! How come Jay hadn't called me yet?!?

I spent the next hour ignoring my children as I sat by the phone and continually refreshed my browser to read where my fellow CHP Wives were headed, and still, no phone call. I got the kids in bed. No phone call. The normal appointed call time of 8 o'clock came, and still, no phone call. 8:30. 8:45. 9:00. Finally, at 9:15 or so the phone rang. I answered as quickly as possible and told Jay in no uncertain terms that he was not to mess around with me and to just tell me where we were assigned. He paused, and I just knew he was thinking of a way to mess with me anyway, so I made a few threats and he finally told me. And now, I get to tell you... drum roll, please....

East LA
Kidding! (Sorry, I had to)

Do you know the way to ... SAN JOSE, baby?!?!

That's right! We get to stay put right here. No frantic searching for a place to live. No desperate hunting for a good school district. No packing up my extremely unorganized garage. And no 9th move in 7 years. I am so happy I could just sing!!! Or eat a whole pan of cookie bars! Or both!!

Craziness

Week 21 was long with a capital L. So... it was Long. Actually, it was long in all caps. LONG. Like that. Maybe that's why I've had such a hard time getting motivated to write this post.

This past week was Scenario testing for Jay's company. I can't go into details about what the testing entails (big brother is watching...) but basically it's when the cadets put all their newly acquired skills to the test. They were tested on 10 scenarios - 5 on Monday and 5 on Tuesday.

On Monday, Jay passed all 5 with flying colors. On Tuesday, he failed 2 of the 5. He was pretty down about it because he did not want to have to stay on Saturday to retest. Luckily they were given another chance on Wednesday to pass any that they may have failed. Jay passed 1 of the 2, which meant he had to stay on Saturday anyway. Oh, and if he failed on Saturday, he would have to pack his bags. It was a stressful few days for this little family, let me tell ya. I knew he would pass, but he was so ... what word am I looking for.... depressed, that he didn't even sound like himself. I was worried that the stress would overwhelm him. So, I did the only thing I know how to do (no... not give him ice cream, he's on the training table!) I prayed. A lot. And as many of you know, I asked for your prayers, too. And... I am happy to report that he passed!! He called me Saturday morning with the fantastic news and it felt like an overweight elephant was lifted off of my shoulders. He was even able to be home by noon on Saturday, so we almost had a full weekend together to boot!

We celebrated that evening with dinner at PF Changs (oh baby!) and my favorite date activity of all... shopping!!! Do you know how lucky I am to have Jay for a husband? Not only does he like Jane Austen and look good awesome in a uniform, he loves to shop! (You ladies can stop throwing things at your screen now.) We bought him some new clothes, including the studliest outfit I've ever seen on him. It's for his graduation party. I bought myself two dresses for his graduation but can't decide between the two, and frankly, neither one of them outshines Jay's outfit, so I'm a little miffed about that. I might have to return them both and start over again.

Sunday came and it was time for Jay to leave for the start of Week 22. He used to leave at about 7 p.m. on Sundays, then it was 8, then 8:30... keep in mind that he has a midnight curfew and a 4 a.m. wakeup call on Mondays. Yet by 8:45 he was still home on Sunday, trying to muster up the motivation to leave. We started bringing his things out to the car when I walked by the kitchen and noticed that a swimming pool had miraculously been installed. Ugh! There was water all over the laundry room and kitchen floors.

It was a mess. Poor Jay tried to find the source of the problem but time was running out. We knew if he was late to the Academy he would lose his Wednesday liberty, so he left me all alone (pout) with the prospect of doing all my dirty dishes in the tub. And of course something like this always happens when I've been ignoring my dishes all weekend. I think I had one fork left and no bowls at all. It all ended happily, though. The plumber came Monday morning and $275 later, the household is running smoothly again. Well... it's running.

And so ends Week 21. Thank you again for all your prayers and positive thoughts this week. We wouldn't have made it through without your support. Less than 6 weeks to go now... glory, glory, hallelujah!

And here are our reasons for going through this crazy experience:

What more can I say?

Tas'd and Confused

Week 20 is over ... aww, yeah!

There are two main things that happened this past week. First, and most importantly, we got The List, otherwise known as The Dream Sheet! This is the list that shows all the CHP offices accepting new cadets from Jay's class. Sometime during Week 19 (ok, maybe even before that) I started bugging Jay about The List every night. I knew it had to be coming soon. Everyday he'd give me whatever update there was, which was usually something like, "They said we should get it soon." Ummmm.... I don't know about you guys but that's not exactly the kind of response I like to get. I'm all about facts, firm dates, cold hard evidence, things of that nature. However, Jay works for the State, so... I am learning to take what I can get.

The kids and I met Jay for liberty on Wednesday and for once I didn't ask him about The List. We sat and talked and ate for at least an hour before Jay smoothly said, "So, we got this memo today..." and out from his inside jacket pocket he pulls ... The List! I screamed. The other IKEA diners looked around and stared as I continued to loudly exclaim things like "I can't believe it!" or "Why didn't you tell me sooner?!?" or simply, "AGH!!!!" all the while hitting him repeatedly with The List. Luckily the IKEA staff knows us by now, otherwise they might have come over and told me to zip my lid.

Of course the single most important thing on The List is how many cadets the San Jose office is taking. I scanned down and bang, there it was... San Jose is taking 6 cadets! There is no gaurantee that we'll get one of those six spots, of course, but the higher number of openings, the better.

We had to rank the offices in order of preference from 1 to 39, so we spent Saturday night grooving to Neil Diamond ("There are two types of people in this world....") as we discussed, revised, checked out maps, and had heated debates about the merits of East LA over Bishop. In the end we were able to agree 100% on the rankings. Our top 5 are:

1) San Jose (accepting 6)

2) Hollister/Gilroy (accepting 3)

3) Santa Cruz (accepting 3)

4) Redwood City (accepting 5)

5) Hayward (accepting 7)

Overall it looks like our chances of staying within commuting distance are good, but I know better than to count on anything. Please, Lord, just don't send us to Needles!

If you're interested, our bottom 5 are:

35) Fort Bragg (there isn't even an office there!)

36) Arrowhead (boonies, baby)

37) Garberville (Jay calls it Garbageville)

38) Mojave (um, I don't think I need to explain)

39) Needles (uber-boonies)

Ok, so this is turning into the Post of the Century, but I need to tell you about the other thing that happened this week, the event that inspired my post title.

Jay had to stay at the Academy on Saturday (grrrr...) for Taser training. They are the first cadet class to receive this training at the Academy. They started by watching a video of someone getting tased, and then the instructors demonstrated on one of the cadets. The whole time this is going on Jay is under the impression that getting tased is voluntary because, well, they said it was. They divided into 6 groups and Jay helped hold on to a few of his classmates as they got tased. As he listened to the grown men yelping, he thought, "Well, that looks like fun for them, but not for me." When the cadet he was holding was done the instructor turned to Jay:

"K, Fear, you're next."

"Um, Sir, I really don't want to do it." (Remember, this was voluntary.)

"How 'bout you just get over here and do what I say."

Jay's training kicked in, "Sir, yes sir!" So much for voluntary.

Two classmates held Jay under the arm and by the forearm. One of them said, "Don't worry Fear, it doesn't hurt that bad." This coming from a guy that was screaming like Chewbacca only minutes before. For some reason his words didn't provide much comfort.

The instructor hooked Jay up with a prong on his shoulder and another one under his buttcheek. And then... he "rode the lightening." It was like sticking your finger in a socket except much more powerful. So powerful that every muscle between his shoulder and upper thigh seized up and he wasn't able to move them at all. He cried out like all the other guys, and then... it was over. It was a long 5 seconds but Jay has decided that he would be tased again before being pepper sprayed again, without a doubt. I'll just take his word for it.

I have my own tasing story I could share, but it will take waaayyy too long. Let's just say it involves my former neighbor - sans clothes. Ask me about it sometime if you have a strong stomach.

If you've stuck with this post this long - thanks! As a reward, below is a post with pics from our IKEA outings. No, no... no need to thank me. It's the least I can do. :)

Wednesday Nights with The Fear's

If you've ever wondered what we do at IKEA during Wednesday night liberty (besides eat Swedish meatballs of course), here's your answer.

We have tea parties

We attack each other and then look as innocent as possible

Sometimes we get to hang out with extended family! This is Jay with his brother Jack and Natalie with her cousin Danica. Our nephew Chris was off reclining in another chair.

We let Dexter test out the sinks

We catch some shut-eye

We try to remove stubborn loose teeth

We play some more...

And then we go home ... exhausted but happy.

The End.